Yes, I plan to use this background to justify to myself the amount of time I spent making it.
2026-03-23-INANIMATE - THIS AINT MAURY
P1
Almost all the characters at the court house.
CRAZY MOFO NELLY
Wait a dang minute...this ain’t Maury! Y’all trickered me!
PHONELLY
Daddy, Gavel is like our version of Maury.
KETTLE
We couldn’t use Maury for legal reasons.
CRAZY MOFO NELLY
Fine, Let’s see what kinda of degenerates this one is about!
P2
Gavel up close.
GAVEL
On today’s episode we will be talking with a few guests who would like to find out who the father of their baby is!
GAVEL
Our first guest today is a little strange. In a Gavel Show first we have a father looking to find out who the mother of his child is.
P3
Adult Diaper joins Gavel
GAVEL
So, Diaper, how do you not know who the mother is?
ADULT DIAPER
When Jr was born I was busy with...well...you know. I came home and he was just...there.
ADULT DIAPER
I’ve always wonder where he came from!
CAPTION 3
What the hell are we doing?
CAPTION
uhh...creating a clever way for Phonelley to tell her parents she’s pregnant.
CAPTION 2
Don’t these types of shows deal with babies that are already born? Not pregnant people?
CAPTION
Oh right...uhhh. Shut up.
